Protection From Red
by Jaylynik
Summary: G1 cartoon, indeterminate season. The Constructicons argue about Magic cards. Omega Supreme is compared with Akroma. Short, and should not be mistaken as serious.


**Protection From Red**

Scavenger opened his Time Spiral booster pack. His optics flashed with shock.

"All right!" he exclaimed joyfully, holding one of the cards up high. "I got an Akroma!"

"What!?"

"Really?!"

"No way!"

The other Constructicons looked up from their various tasks at Scavenger's shouting. Hook, in particular, stood up and approached his sibling.

"You _do_ recall that I get first claim of any white cards, don't you?" Hook observed.

Scavenger's tail drooped, and he cringed away from Hook. "Aw, come on Hook... this one's mine... I bought the booster... please?"

"Now now," interrupted Hook before the simpering could continue. "Aren't you the one who claims that there are no bad cards in Magic, only unloved ones? Why don't you go off and play with your little unloved Squires and your Brass Gnats. You wouldn't want them to get jealous, would you?"

"But... but..." Scavenger attempted to protest, but before he could say more, Mixmaster reached over his shoulder and plucked the card right out of his hand.

Mixmaster whistled as he examined the robot-sized card (which, of course, had to be purchased at a special Transformer-sized hobby and games shop). "Akroma, huh? Not bad, not bad. She's got, what, all of the keywords?"

"She ain't got Flash," Long Haul pointed out from his terminal, where he had been going over various logistic reports in an attempt to create the most efficient delivery schedule possible (thus leaving him with more time to do things that were not hauling).

Bonecrusher snorted. "She don't need it."

Hook crossed his arms and glowered at Mixmaster. "Mixmaster, you play blue. You know that card rightfully belongs to me."

"But _I_ opened it!" protested Scavenger.

Both Hook and Mixmaster ignored Scavenger's protests as Mixmaster continued to look at the card. "'No rest. No mercy. No matter what,'" he said, reading the flavor text aloud.

Scrapper made a quick, single-syllable chuckling noise. "Sounds like our old friend, Omega Supreme."

Hook frowned and stroked his chin, considering this. "It does, somewhat, doesn't it?"

"Akroma could totally take Omega Supreme!" Bonecrusher proclaimed, nodding his head for emphasis.

"What?" Long Haul laughed. "No way. She's just some winged squishy. He's, well... he's Omega Supreme."

"But she's got protection!" Bonecrusher argued.

"Against colors!" Long Haul snorted. "That don't mean anything in the real world! What, so she don't get wet when you throw red paint on her?"

"The colors are supposed to represent temperaments, among other things," Scrapper, who generally played Black because it involved using one's graveyard as a resource, observed. "So maybe she has protection from... certain personality types?"

"But wouldn't we be artifacts?" Scavenger asked. "I mean, Transformers? Because we're, erm, mechanical. 'Constructs.'"

"Oh, bah," Hook growled, snatching the card from Mixmaster's hand as he spoke. "That's just some human nonsense thrown in due to their mistaken assumption that organic life is somehow superior to _real_ life. Besides, look at her quote! It's so close to something Omega himself would say that it's obvious he'd be white!"

"And why would you assign him your color, Hook?" Mixmaster chortled, even as he considered ways to retrieve the card - to keep Hook and Scavenger from having it, if for no other reason. "Do you want to play with Omega Supreme, Hook?"

Before a startled Hook could reply, Scrapper rubbed his chin and leaned back as he considered this. "Actually, he rather reminds me of that Boros guild from Ravnica. That would make him red and white, wouldn't it?"

"Red!" Bonecrusher, who himself played red cards, exclaimed. "That settles it! That means her protection would work against Omega! She wins!" Bonecrusher, for his part, was not particularly worried that one of his opponents would be getting a hold of Akroma. He intended to use the same strategy he always used: blow them and their stuff up before they could get anything good into play.

Hook opened his mouth to discuss the subject further, but was distracted when Scavenger reached up and plucked Akroma from his hand. Then, the digger took off running with his newfound treasure. "Come back here, you!" Hook shouted, chasing after him.

**End**

_Author's Notes: I have no idea where the Constructicons buy their Transformer-sized Magic booster packs. Probably at the same Transformer-sized game store where they buy their Transformer-sized D&D supplements. The general idea here is that they share boosters. Scrapper gets first pick of the black cards, Mixmaster gets first pick of blue, Hook gets first pick of white, Bonecrusher gets first pick of red, and Long Haul gets first pick of green. Scavenger gets the junk no one else wants, and then tries to build them into viable decks to prove that dude, even those poor widdle unloved cards are worth something, too! He usually loses. _

_This was originally done as a meme-challenge. My choice of prompts was:_

_**The whole outcome of The Exorcist would've been different if the priests had proton packs and traps**_

'The power of Christ compels you! ZAP'

_Or: __**My Little Ponies**_

_Or: __**Omega Supreme. Akroma. Explore.**_

_Sadly, I chose to explore the Omega Supreme-Akroma connection over My Little Ponies. I'm sure the world is a much more barren place as a result._

_The original posting of this ficlet can be found at sapphirebreeze-dot-livejournal-dot-com-slash-104703-dot-html_


End file.
